Well, it's 8:30 pm and I still feel like crud.... It's been a while since I've done a RAK here... so let's spice things up a bit. I have an extra little {duplicate} book that I made while making the tutorial. I will leave it without photos and send it to a lucky winner!
Leave me a comment on this post with a funny {clean, G-rated} joke and I will draw a random name {on Friday} to win the prize!
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
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19 comments:
Oh, Erin, I hope that you are feeling much better.
Here is my joke:
"What did 0 say to 8?"
"Nice Belt!"
Get well fast Erin. Two guys walked into a bar. The third one ducks... ROFLOL!!!
Hey Erin ~
So sorry to hear you feel sick! I do hope you get better soon!!! Here is a cute little joke...
One Sunday a pastor told the congregation that the church needed some extra money and asked the people to prayerfully consider giving a little extra in the offering plate. He said that whoever gave the most would be able to pick out three hymns. After the offering plates were passed, the pastor glanced down and noticed that someone had placed a $1,000 bill in the offering. He was so excited that he immediately shared his joy with his congregation and said he'd like to personally thank the person who placed the money in the plate. A very quiet, elderly, saintly lady all the way in the back shyly raised her hand. The pastor asked her to come to the front. Slowly she made her way to the pastor. He told her how wonderful it was that she gave so much and in thanksgiving asked her to pick out three hymns. Her eyes brightened as she looked over the congregation, pointed to the three handsomest men in the building and said, "I'll take him and him and him!"
Hope you get to feeling better soon!!!
I love the album...so cute. Thanks for the tutorial. I hope you get to feeling better soon! Ok...here's my joke:
What is a cannibal's favorite game?
Swallow the leader!
I'm going to leave you a corny laffy taffy joke I got today...
How do you get a peanut to laugh? You crack it up...
lol
I swear, as stupid as those jokes are, they do make me laugh some times. :)
Thanks for the chance to win some candy! I've been blog stalking for a while on here and I just love your work!
Linzi (linzi@mindspring.com
Sorry you're sick Nic! Hope you feel better soon...
In honor of where I was yesterday here's my joke:
What time is it when you go to the dentist? Tooth-hurty! (2:30)
Get better quickly!
She: Do you love me?
He: Madly! I would die for you!
She: You're always saying that, but you never do it!
Ok..hope you feel better, E!
A dumb one...
Brent decides that he's going to help lay some sod. As he's working and sweating in the heat, he notices that something isn't quite right. He says, "Hey Erin Sweety, it's the green side up!"
Cheesy, I know. A guy at work used mine and hubby's names in it when it was told to me. I thought I'd enter, I just couldn't think of a joke. Ok, another one.....
I noticed my neighbor digging holes in the yard, I said "what are you doing that for?" "My cat died" she said, "Well, what's the second hole for?" "The first one is too small!"
Cheesy!!!
Now, I'm all out of jokes that I can even remember.
Monica W.
LOST CAT
A man hated his wife's cat and he decided to get rid of it.
He drove 20 blocks away from home and dropped the cat there.The cat was already walking up the driveway when the man approached the driveway.
The next day, he decided to drop the cat 40 blocks away but the same thing happened.Each time he kept on increasing the number of blocks but the cat kept oncoming home before him!
At last he decided to drive a few miles away, turn right, then left, past the bridge, then right again and another right and so on until he reached what he thought was a perfect spot. Then he dropped the cat there.
Hours later, the man called his wife at home and asked her, "Is the cat there?" "Yes, why do you ask?" answered his wife. Frustrated the man said, "Put that cat on the phone, I'm lost and I need directions.
Hope you're feeling better soon--here's mine. I love that album--so cute :)
Here's my joke. I don't remember exactly, so it might be different than the original:
An elderly couple were both getting forgetful. Their dr. suggested that they write everything down.
One night the man told his wife he was going to get some dessert. He asked his wife if she wanted something.
"Vanilla ice cream. You want me to write it down?"
"no, I can remember"
"I want chocolate syrup on it--should I write it down for you?"
"No"
"I also want whipped cream. Can you remember that?"
"Yes"
A few minutes later, the man walks out and hands his wife a piece of toast with butter on it.
"I told you that you should write it down! You forgot the jelly!"
All these funnies will have you feeling better in no time Erin! I love your work, but I am no joke teller, so here's my husband's favorite:
A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "hey buddy - why the long face?" :o)
~ Nancy - inkblocks
Oh Erin, I hope you feel better soon! :)
Here's my joke...
How do you know if there's an elephant in your refrigerator?
Look for footprints in the Jell-o.
:D
Erin,
Hope you get to feeling better soon. Love your site and the book. Here are some questions for you to ponder...
Is it OK to use the AM radio after noon?
What do chickens think we taste like?
What do people in China call their good plates?
What do you call a male ladybug?
What hair color do they put on the driver's license of a bald
man?
When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
When they first invented the clock, how did they know what time
it was to set it to?
Which is the other side of the street?
Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Why don't they call mustaches "mouthbrows?"
Ohhhh boy...those funnies made me feel great!! I'm still laughing... Now I get why you wanted to have these girls post 'em... you must be feeling at least a little bit better, huh?? I had trouble with the "clean" part, being a former bartender - - let's give these a go...shall we?? This first one was a favorite on St. Patty's Day!!
An Irishman walks into a bar and orders three glasses of Guiness, drinking them one at a time. Noticing this odd ritual, the bartender explains that the beer goes flat when poured and informs the man his beer would be much fresher if he ordered one glass at a time.
The Irishman explains he began this custom with his two brothers, who have moved to America and Australia, respectively. This is their way of remembering all the time they spent drinking together.
The man becomes a regular at the pub, well-known for always ordering three beers at once. One day he walks in and orders only two beers. Assuming the worst, a hush falls among other patrons.
When the Irishman returns to the bar to order his second round, the bartender quietly offers his condolences. The man looks confused for a moment, and then explains, "No, everyone's fine. I gave up beer for lent."
errr...how about this one, then?...
McQuillan walked into a bar and ordered martini after martini, each time removing the olives and placing them in a jar. When the jar was filled with olives and all the drinks consumed, the Irishman started to leave. "S'cuse me," said a customer, who was puzzled over what McQuillan had done. "What was that all about?" "Nothing," said the Irishman, "my wife just sent me out for a jar of olives."
Get better Erin Go Braugh!!
~Susan
okay, this was my kids favorite joke when they were younger. Why is 6 afraid of 7? because 7 8 9. I know you are rolling on the floor in fits of laughter. I hope you are feeling better soon. You should be...laughter is the best medicine.
Hope your feeling better. Love your mini book & the tutorial. Great job!
Here's my funny!
Martin had just received his brand new drivers license. The family troops out to the driveway, and climbs in the car, where he is going to take them for a ride for the first time. Dad immediately heads for the back seat, directly behind the newly minted driver.
"I'll bet you're back there to get a change of scenery after all those months of sitting in the front passenger seat teaching me how to drive," says the beaming boy to his father.
"Nope," comes dad's reply, "I'm gonna sit here and kick the back of your seat as you drive, just like you've been doing to me all these years."
doverdi
Fiskateer #1329
UNDERSTANDING WOMEN
(A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)
I know I'm not going to understand women.
I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax, pour it onto
your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root, and still be afraid of
a spider.
Haha what a fun idea.
A boy dresses up for Halloween and he is the cutest Pirate you have ever seen, he has the eye patch, hate, earrings, sword! The whole nine yards!
So he walks up to the neighbors house and rings the bell and says "trick or TREAT!....the neighbor looks at him and says."Aren';t you the best looking PIRATE I have ever seen! Your costume is perfect! But where are your Bucaneers??"
The kid looks up and says "Under My Bucin-Hat!"
Not sure if I'm too late to enter but, here's a joke i heard recently, thought it was funny!
A woman comes home for Bible study group to find someone robbing her house. She shouts at him from behind "Stop! Acts 2:38!" (Which is 'Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins.')
Well the buglar froze dead in his tracks and didn't move. The lady called the cops and told them to come get him. As the officers were taking the man away they asked him, "Why did you stay, why didn't you run? All the lady did was shout some bible verse at you."
"What bible verse? asked the theif, "she said she had an axe and two 38's!!" :)
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